Goblin (2010)


Jeffrey Scott Landon
Starring: Gil Bellows, Camille Sullivan,  USA. 1h 40m

This movie is a joke! It’s one of those terrible “horror” movies that can come on at tea time and won’t scare your gran. I’m not sure why or how these get made but here is Goblin. prepared to be bored.
Starting with a brave but done to death dramatic intro, a woman’s baby is tossed into an open fire during a Salem witch trial scenario and in response she curses the town and any child who is born from this olde day onwards but resurrecting a goblin from the ashes of her dead baby. Cut to modern day generic family  having to move into the country and ruff it with some locals who start acting strange and boom, mythological creature is stalking everyone.
Then the movie properly cuts to the modern-day where we see a young family settling down into a new home in a shady village in the middle of nowhere, all of the residents are quite concerned about the fact that the family have young children obvious to the viewer is fully aware of the Witch who just put a  curse the entire village in any newborn but the family has left to their own devices.

Eventually the typical and uninspired horror movie plot starts to unfold the parents find some excuse to get out of the way leaving teenage daughter and friends to go and make out and become bait for the beast which for the most part of the movie is just a coat figure mosque near the finale.

This film is about one step up from any of those horrible mutant monster films but probably could have benefited from you taking this over with something sharp like just to give it an edge. There is absolutely no horror associated with this film in any sense, the film dispenser becoming one message Downer similar to the same down and you’ll experience while trying to recount what happened to your time. It’s the epitome of terrible script and the worst choices made in horror movie ever. Sometimes bad movies are very watchable but I struggled…




Rating 2/10

R – Ogre (2008), Warlock The Armageddon (1993)
L – Selected Z Movies
A – Do we NEED bad movies?
Vs – Goblin Vs Ogre

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