Slash Dance (1989)

Director: James Shyman
Starring: Cindy Ferda, James Carroll Jordan, J. Buzz Von Ornsteiner. USA 1h 23m

This movie was brought to my attention from fellow Twitter reviewer, Christopher Zisi @cjzisi Who is the master of all B-Movies,  and in this case I just couldn’t resist and I had to give this one a go  as it really did seem too good to miss.

A super tough female police officer who believes that she could probably kick Cynthia Rothrock ass,  goes undercover As a dancer in a old theatre and order to uncover who has been killing young girls auditioning for particular role.

Rupert: Rupert is the name, a poet as free as the ocean wind. And like a chiseled rock, I shall reveal… my cock.

[opens coat and flashes a woman who is sunbathing]

Tori Raines: Why don’t you take Tiny Tim home.

Rupert: I’ll interpret that as a lack of interest. The rudeness of people on the beaches in this day and age.

I must admit but I did believe that it was just a cheaper budget the thriller,  some kind of cop drama but just didn’t have the budget but was trying to convince an audience, but within the first few seconds  it’s pretty easy to realise that this is balanced highly up on the comedy scale, which isn’t necessarily a huge problem, but it does distract from the potential Giallo  elements of the film.

A hard-working police officer Tori Raines (Ferda)is pulled from her daily duties of beating up bad guys in dark alleyways,  by her yuppie boss who sit behind a desk preaming himself all day, he just wants to make himself look good so he can be promoted,  and somehow he feels her active duty is a distraction, Tori doesn’t want to get pulled from her duties, but there is a strange connection as she is approached by two heavy street hitters also two ladies from GLOW (Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling),  who have managed to lose one of their nieces who auditioned for a role at a local theatre and it’s never been seen again. Tori joins the dance group and within days another girl goes missing and is found brutally murdered. While learning all of the dance steps to perfection, and there are a lot of scenes and a lot of dance steps…our  heroin has to try and unravel who was killing the girls and why? The main culprit is Amos, Whose name sounds like anus when it’s shouted by his uncle, a bizarre and violent John Travolta look alike who hangs around the theatre but the mystery goes deeper than that But can Tori work it out in time?

This is generally good fun and there’s lots of comedy,  some slapstick thrown in for good measure, and while it’s quite easy not to take it as a serious thriller,  some of the dark and the corridor scenes in gloved hands is slightly reminiscent of Giallo, which is a genre that doesn’t shy away from murders in theatres and certainly not when it involves young pretty girls.  But with the amount of cheese thrown in its hard to take it too serious, for some reason the director felt that it was essential to go through every single dance routine step by step which pads out half of the film.  but apart from that it’s a pretty decent comedy thriller that you can sit back and watch.

Rating 2/10

R: Punk Vacation (Video 1990)
L: A-Z of Crime B-Movies Volume 1

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