Director: Erdal Ceylan.
Starring. Alyson Walker, Tony Giroux, Meelah Adams. USA. 1h 15m.
Selfie from Hell, started out as a 2 minutes horror movie that for millions of views on YouTube years ago, but now we have this full length feature that’s supposed to up the ante and the short answer is that.. “nope” it just doesn’t come across as being more frightening or more compelling than the horror short.
So some girl gets terrorised by a shadowy figure which is stalking her in her selfies, any other photo is totally fine but whenever she takes a picture of herself this dark monster begins to get closer, until one picture later and boom it’s upon her and while she’s now bedridden her “niece”? (I really couldn’t care for the relationship, the build up to this point was slow and .. boring) visits to help look after her, and starts to dig into the story and is soon hunted by the same entity but luckily she has a laptop and starts to find answers on the dark web… Continue reading Selfie from Hell (2018),
Director:James Bryan, Brother Bryan .
Starring. Jack McClelland, Mary Gail Artz,James P. Hayden,Angie Brown. USA. 1h 22m.
This is a total no brainer horror, but one of the uncanny I’ve seen from this era for quite some time. at first it seems that it’s going to build into something special in that b movie kinda way but I feel this is one of the Sharknado, Icetastrophy, Zodiac of the apocalypse low budget flops of yesteryear that didn’t mature well.
A group of young people head into the wilderness for some “fun” mostly pratting around splashing water at each other and pulling stupid pranks but unbeknownst to them there’s a lunatic in a joke shop viking outfit that stalks the woods and kills tourist on a whim. Usually the teens are a bit more liberal, heading out into nature for sexy good times and probably ludicrous amounts of drugs, but back in the 70’s it was usually just a chance to make out. While there’s not a lot of naughtyness there is a fair amount of slashing, for a slasher.. So one by one they are stalked by this crazy guy wearing skins who lives off trash and the land, he doesn’t say much apart from some odd screeching but he can book it for a fat guy. Continue reading Don’t go into the woods (alone) (1981)
Director: Greg Lamberson
Starring: Robert Sabin, Mary Hunter, Bunny Levine, Dennis Embry. USA. 1h 28m
Despite being on par with the average Troma movie this imaginative occult gory body horror is strangely fun to watch and gives adequate nods to a number of classic horror movies in a psychotropic manner.
When a young art student, Alex (Devon) moves into a new apartment in a run down area of NYC with the intentions of getting his girlfriend Lori (Hune) to “sleep over”, he tries to be accommodating of his misfit neighbours, but after a supposedly vegetarian meal of Himalayan Yogurt made by Landlady Lizzie (Jane Doniger Reibel) with one of the more poetic tennants Roman (Embry), that’s quickly washed down with a mysterious home brew made by her dead alchemist father Zachary. His timid girlfriend Lori Starts to notice disturbing changes in her boyfriend, especially after he awakens one morning with a new blood lust and dripping with slime. Continue reading Slime City (1988)
Director:Ugezu J Ugezu .
Starring. Bob Manuel Udokwu, Chioma Chukwuka, Ugezu J Ugezu, Uju Okoli . Nigeria. 5h 25m.
For Nollywood this is certainly one of my all time favourites and I believe the first full length one I saw back in 2016, I was a total noob but I fell in love with the genre and didn’t realise that the movies would be so long, like mini series, this 4 part epic (each episode over an hour) is a tale of woe and magical mystery.
So a loving and yet very strict businessman, named Silas played by Bob Manuel Udokwu, runs a thriving business, when he’s not running his corporation with an iron first, he’s loving his beautiful wife, Elizabeth (Chukuka) and their daughter, Elizabeth is heavily pregnant with their second child, this comes after a losing her previous baby, but with care and love they family have picked themselves up and are trying again. Continue reading The Sorrows of Elizabeth (2016)
Director: Brian M. Cassidy, Melanie Shatzky
Starring: Various, all cast as themselves .USA. 1h 08m
Asylums, homes, and other residential institutions are some of the least known places to the masses, more films and documentaries are made about prisons as there’s some sense that we know what life inside is like. The common perception is that the inmates of other houses don’t have interesting tales to share with us. The Patron Saints, is a stark reminder of the life and stories are still alive in the oldest generation and through this challenging piece of work I found a new respect for those who we should praise more than others in their golden years. Continue reading The Patron Saints (2011)
I decided that I really needed to put some effort into these shorts, if I’m ever going to get back up to date with things! And with the release of Salad Fingers Ep. 11 I had renewed energy!
Often in short movies there’s not a huge amount of time to elaborate on the characters back stories and this unknown is rarely played apon but it’s put to very good use in this incredibly well shot; out of body horror experience. A young girl has just moved into her new home and decides to try a guided out of body experience, but once out of her body she is witness to a gruesome act upon her unmanned body and is unable to awake. There are some really amazing detailed slow motion scenes and effects in this terrific horror. 8/10
Not to be mistaken for another short film with the same name, reviewed here . This tension filled short has a lot of merit, the cast of two manage to create a damning atmosphere when a cleaner is faced with an curious intruder, there is a good display of camera work but the sound is minimal. The ending is quite pivotal and yet hangs wide open but remains terrifically terrifying. 7/10 Continue reading Short movie roundup Feb 03 2019
This weeks short film roundup, is heavily horror themed as these are sometimes the best and more inventive short films around, kicking off this week’s selection is…
The Moonlight Man 2
If you haven’t seen the first, I featured it here. Danny Donahue shouldn’t be a stranger to any horror fanatics out there as he creeped the internet out with his amazing short movies including Vermin and the Whisperer. He has a talent for creating the creepiest demented monsters and building insane tension mostly through camera work tight timing. This feature see’s a wouldbe thief have his plans spoiled by the moonlight man who I think just wants to play. This isn’t the most frightening of his collection but it’s part of an impressive resume, he also has a lot of “Making of” movies. 5/10
Sadly this one isn’t based on a particular hunchback but instead a son is prepping funeral arrangements with his sister as they have lost their father when he’s suddenly deafened by the sound of ringing bells, then he notices a figure moving inside his home and before you know it, he’s following a blood trail…
If nothing else the use of sounds is incredibly effective in this unusual horror movie that features a bizarre toothy monsteress. But overall it doesn’t gel together all that well, but it’s filmed and acted well and does have a few scares even if it’s a bit incoherent. 3/10
And the best for last!?
I have been DYING to see this film for ages when I missed it at the Estonian film fest and then again at Screamfest.. how unlucky can a girl be…probably not as unlucky as the girl in this charming and deadly film
Alfred J Hemlock
In the previews this character reminded me of a dodgy Johnny Depp fucked up on London Gin and I wasn’t far wrong, just add some Beetlejuice, and viola! . A young girl, named Emily is dumped on the way home by a jealous and pissed off boyfriend after an argument at a party, sobbing she says to herself that she wants to die.. and while heading home she chances on a comedy villain who identifies himself as Alfred J Hemlock who terrorizes her. while the matter is serious there’s a touch of League of Gentlemen in this charismatic thriller. I would like to see more of Mr Hemlock in the future, he’s brilliant running around dark alleys with a hatchet and singing strane songs while riding a tiny bicycle.. what more do you want from a horror villain. Lead man Tristan McKinnon who only seems to have made a few shorts, really can hold his own in a full length film and hopefully if Wyrmwood Chronicles of the Dead takes off I hope he gets a proper role. 7/10
Director: Justin Price
Starring: Natassia Halabi, Gabriel Miller, Lassiter Holmes. USA. 1h 30m
I’m sure this film was intended to scare but it’s a new form of mental torture that I wasn’t quite prepared for when I sat down to watch this.
The not so credible story is centred on Nick (Miller) and his bodacious botoxed girlfriend Victoria (Halabi), opening in an old antique/toyshop that Nick has inherited the couple take stock of the contents while out shopping for Christmas gifts. Nick breaks away while Victoria take a pointless and long winded phone call, meanwhile he discovered a chest with handmade toys, the room begins to fill up with fresh snow as he discovers a creepy Elf toy holding a knife, attached to it is a curse/spell after reading this out he noticed that there’s a list of name at the bottom and they correspond to his family, meh nothing strange about this. Continue reading The Elf (2017)
Director: Jeff Lieberman
Starring: Alexander Brickel, Kateryn Winnick, Stephen Graham, Amanda Plummer, Wass Stevens, Joshua Annex. USA. 1h 40m.
I found this lesser known gem in the bargain bucket, it came as one of those double sided discs with an equally bizarre b movie, Killer X (1999), it stayed on my shelf for years until I had a particularly shitty break up and I decided to settle down with a tub of ice cream and sob into it with a terrible movie to remind myself just how shit my life was at the time but this stunning movie really uplifted my evening.
Directed by Jeff Lieberman, a meistro who lives to live life on the edge with psychedelic and wayward classics such as Blue Sunshine (1977), Just Before Dawn (1981) and Squirm (1976) under his belt, but with this modern approach to horror, he seemed to not take any aspect of this movie all that serious but it still manages to be a creepy comedy horror with some very dark undertones, totally different from this retro classics but so brilliant in it’s own quirky rights. Continue reading Satan’s Little Helper (2004)
Director: Hope Perello
Starring: Michelle Matteson, Bruce Payne, Carol Lynley, Deep Roy, Brendan Hughes, Antonio Fargas . USA . 1h 42m
(Loosely) based on The Howling Series of novels by Gary Brandner especially Howling III Echoes.
Have you ever woken up from a hazy dream and tried to piece it back together to make a story..that’s kinda how this installment of Howling plays out. Loosely based on the third Howling book, it’s set around the life of a unusual drifter who stumbles on the wrong town. Despite his natural ability to look like Charlie Chaplin he actually has a much more dangerous and darker secret, being part of the Howling series it’s no surprise really but there’s more, just follow him down the rabbit hole… Continue reading Howling VI : The Freaks (1991)