When Love Happens (2014)

Director: Seyi Babatope
Starring: Weruche Opia OC Ukeje Beverly Naya Oreka Godis Gideon Okeke Bukky Wright Desmond Elliot Wale Ojo. Nigeria. 1h 40m

This has to be one of the best produced Nollywood films I’ve seen for some time, not only is the sound ok, but the production is not notch and it used some really artistic camera techniques, and it even has it’s own Wiki page https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/…When_Love_Happens

Judy (2014)

Director: Emanuele De Santi
Writer: Emanuele De Santi
Stars: Jade Matthew, Carol Bolt, Ashleigh Whitfield. Italy. 1h 20m

The previews, trailers, reviews and DVD cover for this movie look absolutely beautiful, they all contain strong imposing grotesque images, that I thought had resulted from amazing and powerful horror film, brutally deadly and messy but unfortunately that’s not the way the cookie crumbled.

“Bad things happen to bad people” that’s what the ringleader of a deranged group of Street performers called the crows always says and she decided to unleash the wrath of a gang on a woman and her dog. Mary and Judy,  I’d just like to point out that Judy is the dog, stop at some traffic lights and Mary did the worst thing ever!!! she actually ignored a street performer trying to get money out of her, just an freakish old woman in clown make up (nightmare fuel) and somehow this in self that turns into a brutal stalking and takedown mission on her and her dog.

Unconditional (2014/2015)

This is pure daytime drama that if it were to be remade would probably star Bette Midler,  but this turned out to be an interesting Nollywood film, it strives to be different from  the majority of the other flicks that revolve around broken marriage, love and crime.

A mother is at work when her distraught sister arrives and through her blubbering she describes how she’s managed to lose one of the children. While driving them home she stops to allow one of the elder daughters to pee, but when she returns to the car, one of the baby twin girls is missing, after her confession they rush to the police station and they turn out to be total arseholes about the situation. A search is eventually started by a private detective. Meanwhile an it seems agency owner becomes the main attraction as the overweight vicious and horrid woman bullies her staff, husband and customers.

Apocalyptic (2014)

Director:Glenn Triggs
Starring. Jane Elizabeth Barry, David Macrae, Geoff Pinfield. Australia.1h 24m

A majorly flawed found footage movie that has a few cult style frights and thrills to offer but some mistakes just can’t be overlooked.

Starting unassumingly with a small crew making a documentary at an AA/Drugs Rehab meeting, they chance upon a striking individual who claimed that he escaped from a doomsday cult isolated on a remote farm, realising that this story would be more exciting the team embark to the rural cult’s home to investigate the bizarre group and their end of days prophecies. The strangeness of the cult is soon put aside when the team attempt to save one of the members and themselves, as it’s clear that the world isn’t going to end or is it?

I had to try and spice up the plot after damming the movie in the first line. I did really enjoy the film but the ending was such a let down for myself, but that’s just me, it wouldn’t stop me from watching it again just due to the bat shit crazy events and fucked up social experiment that is exposed in the movie.

Find Me (2014)

Director: Andy Palmer.
Starring: Cameron Bender, Kathryn Lyn, Rachelle Dimaria . USA. 1h 25m.

A young couple are still unboxing when an unwelcomed entity becomes a terrifying pain in the ass. Yep I’m going there with this film, it has to be done. There are shedloads of these poor horrors that are neither sensible, linear or entertaining, Fine me doesn’t offer as much as it promises and only slowly eeks out a twist that we all saw coming.

The Last Saint (2014)

Director: Rene Naufahu.
Starring: Calvin Tuteao, Beulah Koale, Joseph Naufahu, Xavier Horan . New Zealand. 1h 51m.

Riding off the success of a movie made over 22  years ago, The Last Saint promises to be as bold and impressive but it doesn’t explode in the same way and could easily be mistaken as a whimper.

Ich Seh Ich Seh- Goodnight Mommy (2014)

Directors: Severin Fiala, Veronika Franz
Writers: Veronika Franz (screenplay), Severin Fiala (screenplay)
Starring: Lukas Schwarz, Elias Schwarz, Susanne Wuest. Austria. 1h 39m

In the heat of a long summer, twin boys impatiently await the return of their mother after her cosmetic surgery. Her return doesn’t bring the happiness you’d expect from a mother returning to her 9 year old children, instead they suspect another person has taken her place and search for the truth as her reactions to them are tragically different from what they remember, who or what is really under the bandages.

Treehouse (2014)

Director :Michael Bartlett
Starring :J. Michael Trautmann Dana Melanie Daniel Fredrick Clint James. USA. 1h 38m

The film had so much potential and offered a lot of misleading ideas with previews cover art and publicity that’s ok because I understand that a film does need to be pushed in it’s early stages and it doesn’t mean that it’s a terrible film but it’s just not the supernatural thriller that I was expecting.

All that aside let’s have a look at what Treehouse has to offer, the film opens with a teen girl returning home to find her family missing, she grabs her daddys  shotgun and goes to investigate the scene ends with the screams of her little brother coming from the forest with a shadowy figure looming over her. cutting to the strife of two brothers at a local school the younger being bullied and the older looking after him after getting into a fight they return home to a TV broadcast about a missing girl and other local children, a new curfew has come into place but ignoring the advice they go out into the forest to find the missing kids and end up facing the worst nightmares after they found the missing girl disheveled and frightened in a Treehouse.

4 Horror Shorts – Phil-a-del-phi-a, Skypemare, Amy’s Torch and Tea Time

Phil-a-del-phi-a
Director : Broadway
Starring : Chase Ramsey, JJ Shurbet. USA. 4m 50s

Quite a phenomenal short movie, which encompasses a lot of ideas, almost too simple for it’s own good I think a lot of people will miss how brilliant it is. A couple of brothers are travelling across country after a sort of interdimensional apocalypse, any loud noises results in people being snatched by invisible beings, the brother have lost their family and are travelling as silently as possible, until one simple and innocent mistake bring a sudden doom. It’s shocking and the narration is heartfelt. There is a lot of great acting from both young men, and some intelligent camera work, which makes up for the lack of effects, and this is a prime example of how to avoid effects, sticking with a good story is enough. There is a short piece after this finale which really brings home the melancholia, the young boy is an old man now and still lives in hope that his loved ones will return. 6/10

Tea Time (2009)
Duration 3.19

This short is more disturbing than most I’ve seen, without trying to chuck in millions of jump scares this is way more psychological and includes simple but uncommonly effective camera effects. An elderly woman starts to make tea for herself and her husband. During the daily ritual of tea making a dark story starts to unfold. This murderous old dear has only gone and slaughtered gramps and pus pus..the ghosts do start to haunt her and a mental break down seems to be shaken off as she gets to work cleaning up her “mess”. Filmed in sequence and with one take each, this short film was made on a single Super-8 cartridge. It looks like a home video and has an abnormal atmosphere about it, there is also a dead cat under the sink and that pleases me muchly. 8/10

SKYPEMARE (2014)
Director: John Fitzpatrick
Starring : Cerina Vincent and Annika Marks. USA. 7m11s

What a load of something, this horror, thriller, black comedy isn’t quite what I was expecting. Two women talking over skype on Hallowe’en when one of them is attacked and the other is helpless!!? This is how it’s advertised but it’s quite different. The chick doing all the viewing, does try to help her friend, by calling the police 3 times, as she doesn’t know her best friend’s address (whatever), all this time the killer is sending her gory photos of his handiwork on her besties, then the killer reveals that the friends phone showing her address, she grabs a knife, to protect herself (after emptying the knife block and checking the dishwasher?? Who has time for this) and then makes a slapstick error. It’s sardined with errors and cliches but I guess you have to take the bad with the good right, it’s no Unfriended (2015) but that wasn’t actually all that good either.. It was just waaaay too slow to pick up and the acting is pathetic, maybe it’s supposed to be a comedy?? 3/10

Amy’s Torch
Created by : Gary Mellor and Ben Wilkinson

This was recommended after the long lasting effects that Lights Out was keeping me up at night, it’s not as scary but it does run along a similar pattern, in hindsight though this is way more violent. A young girl called Amy has a torch that keeps away the monsters at night, but one night the battery runs out. There’s a scream in the night, her mother comes to the rescue, poor innocent Amy is pointing under the bed, her mother goes to check and.. RAH scary monster. It has this soft hazy fairytale beginning and it’s only downside is that it doesn’t really have any build up but it’s got a semi decent jump scare. 4/10

Jinn (2014)

Director : Ajmal Zaheer Ahmad.
Starring : Ray Park, Serinda Swan, Dominic Rains, William Atherton, Faran Tahi. USA. 1h 39m

I made a tragic mistake of leaving this for a “good time movie afternoon” and then I totally ignored all the warnings.. Because at the end of the day I can only really rely on my own opinion and that’s why I end up watching a lot of shit movies.
This film claims to introduce Jinn to western cinema, so fuck Wishmaster, Long Time Dead (2002), Red Sands (2009) and Djinn (2014) among other films hey..

So this horror starts as a fantasy, a long man preps and goes to war with the Jinn after someone who isn’t John Hurt does the One Ring to Bind them intro.

In the Beginning, Three were Created…
Man made of Clay.
Angels made of Light.
And a Third…made of Fire.